Misplaced jealousy? Once I had been solitary, he became Mr Helpful.

July 21, 2021

Hi all. My BF and I also do not yet live together (due to complicated DC and never attempting to mix families) Been together 6 years. Our company is one another’s help bubbles.

Like in my username, he’s got the thing I perceive to become a knight in shining armour complex. There clearly was history.

We were both married to other people when we met. We divorced first. We’d exactly the same band of friends, therefore still socialised into the group that is same.

He utilized to demand friendly chats, bring me personally hand me downs of his DS’s clothing for mine that is a younger year. He could be quite great at DIY and would provide to accomplish jobs that are odd me personally. All extremely innocent. No flirting. No recommendation of any other thing more than relationship from either part.

He later divorced himself therefore we met up 24 months from then on.

Through the entire very first few years, he constantly did actually have feminine buddy or two whom required some kind of help. He could be a shoulder that is caring cry on, do odd jobs, be helpful. absolutely absolutely absolutely nothing every seemed untoward. Very often these ladies had been hitched and he never hid any such thing. I never distrusted him.

It went incorrect onetime as he had a lady buddy who was simply solitary and, as time continued, it became obvious than he intended that she thought there was more to this. We went round to their 1 day and she ended up being here having coffee with him and she seemed pretty shaken to see me personally. We told him them that it had been dodgy in which he would have to be careful that she was not obtaining the incorrect concept.

One time he told me he had agreed to just take her down dance one night as she ended up being lonely and was not dating anybody. We said which was a boundary that is massive and explained just mature dating how that could turn to her. I happened to be livid he had been asking another woman away on a romantic date, but he stated it had been rubbish and she knew the rating. He wanted her to possess some business and a good particular date.

We explained that a solitary girl getting that standard of relationship and help from a guy is nearly constantly planning to wonder just what more there was to it. He disagreed and stated it had been a fact that is sad I was thinking by doing this about guys and their motivations.

Sooner or later, inevitably, perhaps, she propositioned him one time and then he shut it straight down and stated he had been beside me. (we saw the communications. She was annoyed).

She then instead rapidly disappeared from the scene (most likely as a result of just how much she need experienced lead on). He had been upset because she had read him all wrong (! that he had lost a friend)

We told him he previously been an idiot and then he finally consented That I’d been appropriate all along He stated he will be more mindful to any extent further and keep their boundaries with ladies in check.

He additionally remarked that he could be much the same with male buddies. He could be a neck, a help, he is great for DIY, he does not begin to see the distinction, however now this had happened using this woman he could observe that it surely isn’t exactly the same with single women buddies and certainly will be look over wrongly.

No problems that are further. as yet.

He’s working away a complete lot right now and then we are getting through to FaceTime. A month or more ago, he explained he had spent one hour from the counselling a junior colleague who was simply having a time that is hard. It absolutely was fairly belated in the night rather than work associated. Knight in shining armour once again. He was told by me to be mindful.

Then the week ago, he said she possessed a work issue at the office in which he had sorted it on her behalf. Once again – he is her supervisor, making sure that’s to be anticipated (absolutely nothing to see right right here. really. he said)

Yesterday evening, he called me personally and explained he have been round to correct her washer.

We am beyond pissed off.

Firstly, it is a lockdown that is bloody exactly why is he compromising our bubble by entering her home?

Next, what sort of work relationship involves planning to somebody’s house to complete odd jobs?

Thirdly, this woman is solitary. She is being given by him plenty of attention and we also have actually talked relating to this before. Whatever he believes is and isn’t happening, she shall most likely think he is interested.

Thus I have actually reminded him of what took place the past some time exactly how it spoiled a relationship because their friend got the wrong impression.

Have always been we being completely whenever Harry came across Sally concerning this? i am aware that women and men may have platonic friendships. I’ve plenty myself, but i cannot help thinking that whatever their motives are here, it should seem like something different to her – and I also’m maybe perhaps not confident with it. It really is a boundary he crossed before also it finished poorly.

He says i will be having a seed and making an oak tree. He states he’s doing exactly just exactly what he’d do for someone else (which can be real).

Have always been we massively over reacting by being unhappy about any of it? He could be being clear. He constantly is, but section of me believes this is certainly a type of ego boosting/plan B ing – or at the least carrying out a show of ‘what an excellent man we am’ to some other girl.

I do not desire to make thing from the jawhorse whether it’s simply me personally being pathetic and over responding.